Life lesson: Financial realities must be faced.
This post is dedicated to my many incredible friends at Navy Federal Credit Union, who have had my back for several years, more so after my spouse's passing.
There are some rude awakenings when you are in the process of grieving and re-entering life. A major one for me had to do with finances. While caring for my loved one, I had hastily scrutinized joint accounts, investment income and costs of our needs. It was not the most pressing item on the care agenda. The resultant financial aspects were an unwelcome awakening for me.
After my loved one was gone, notices started coming in, taxes were due, serious looking annual meetings demanded my response, and some bills were overdue and penalties had been assessed. I was not prepared.
Even though we were married, we had our own accounts and investments. I could not stand to look at my spouse’s finances for at least five months, and then it was the end of the year and decisions had to be made.
How did I want IRAs to be paid out? Banks did not want to do what I wanted them to do. Some accounts were placed in other accounts, which I did not want.
What should have been a seamless transfer of funds from trust to trust, managed to collect snares and snags.
Accounts had to be closed and transferred. Each time felt like death all over again. I would be thrown to the floor in grief. I finally had to engage a financial expert to speak for me to sort out the messes banks had created.
It’s a hard time to deal with such serious issues, but eventually it has to be done. I’m not a financial advisor, and I’m certainly not a money person, but the following are a few of the things I did.
Sorted all the bills into one pile.
Sorted what had to be paid, focusing on what was overdue and paid those first.
Piled investments into another pile to see if responses were required and by what date.
Looked at other investment income, such as bank accounts, CDs or IRAs, checked maturity dates and marked them on a calendar.
Tried to get a fix on my income, which is now reduced by one Social Security check.
As time permitted, I tried to get a fix on what my future bills and income will be.
Listened if someone advised me, but made my own decisions.
As I sort things out, and it is not easy, it will give me a platform upon which to make financial decisions. The realities of business practices have no sympathy. Financial issues have no heart. I’ve wallowed through them so far.
Keep at it. Finances are one of the hard realities of re-entering life.
Let me know how you are doing. I care.
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Photo credit: © 2023 Rachel Gareau
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